Chowek Posted January 8, 2012 Report Share Posted January 8, 2012 Customer: “Hi, my son says that I have Spartans on my laptop and I should bring it to you guys.†Tech Support: “…Ma’am? Spartans?†Customer: “Yes, I called my son at school and told him that screens keep popping up all the time, and he said that I have Spartans.†Tech Support: “Oh! You mean Trojans! That’s a possibility; let me run this analyzer on your laptop real quick and we’ll see what’s going on.†Customer: “Young man, my son is in college and he says it has Spartans. You just stand here in a little uniform and make minimum wage. I think my son knows what he is talking about.†Tech Support: “You’re right ma’am. I was hoping to run a diagnostic and find out that it wasn’t Spartans, but just by looking at the login screen, I can tell that you probably have about 300 of the little guys running around.†Customer: “300?! Is that bad?†Tech Support: “It’s horrible. They cram themselves into a bottleneck and kill wave after wave of data, until there is a wall of dead programs blocking any more traffic through your computer.†Customer: “Oh, that just figures. I’m going to go buy a new computer.†Tech Support: “Ok, ma’am, I think that would be best.†Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pera451 Posted January 8, 2012 Report Share Posted January 8, 2012 Druga verzija Vlajinog vica. - Znas, danas je moja zena klecala preda mnom. - Stvarno, ne lici mi na nju? - Ma da, klecala je ispred kreveta i rekla mi: "Izadji odatle da te ja ne izvlacim". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iron man Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sondek Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Sede dva srbina u kafani,nazdravljaju "Ajd' jos jednu ipak sam dobio dete" "ma celo vece dete,pa dete- jel sin ili cerka? "...E to ce da vidimo kad poraste". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brale Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Pirocanac kupio sincicu bonbonu kao poklon za rodjendan. Mali sav srecan sto je ove godine dobio poklon odmah je stavi u usta. Prodje nedelju dana .... kad zena rece Pirocancu : "Jooooj daj molim te da mu skinemo celofan" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omega Posted January 15, 2012 Report Share Posted January 15, 2012 Otisao Muja u Njujork,i dobije stan pun miseva, zove on gazdu: -Hello,! -Hello,what is the problem? -You know Tom and Jerry? -Yes,Tom and Jerry? -E pa Jerry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anthony Posted January 15, 2012 Report Share Posted January 15, 2012 leti vrabac kroz sumu kad uhvati ga meda i pita: - jel', ko si ti? - ja sam orao! - hm..pa sto si tako mali ako si orao? - pa malo sam bolestan! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nrvn Posted January 15, 2012 Report Share Posted January 15, 2012 Otisao Muja u Njujork,i dobije stan pun miseva, zove on gazdu: -Hello,! -Hello,what is the problem? -You know Tom and Jerry? -Yes,Tom and Jerry? -E pa Jerry hvala, odavno se nisam ovako nasmejao. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mingus,Mingus Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Zamisli da se prezivas Svrsic i odes kod zubara i zubar ti kaze: "Otvorite usta Svrsicu" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anthony Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Zamisli da se prezivas Pusic i odes kod zubara i zubar ti kaze: ''Zatvorite usta Pusicu'' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vladovid Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 sorry ali doktori obicno pacijente zovu po imenu, policajci, advokati i sudije upotrebljavaju prezimena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sondek Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Zaustavi policajac auto i upita vozaca: -Vase ime i prezime? -Zoran Markovic. -a vase? ,upita suvozaca -Zoran Petrovic. -a vi ste rodjaci. mislim,slabo oni tu prave razliku,... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sondek Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 inace moj stari zubar me zvao "sta ima Zeko". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bujodrag Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Moja mlada i zgodna zubarka me zvala "BezobrazniÄe". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boskogit Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Moja mlada i zgodna zubarka me zvala "BezobrazniÄe". ZaÅ¡to? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bujodrag Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VU metar Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Nije redovno prao zube a tvrdio da jeste. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pera451 Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Bujo, priznaj da si ti autor pesme "Moja zubarka" grupe Ruz . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bujodrag Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Davno bilo, viÅ¡e se niÄega ne sećam. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anthony Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Ide zeka kroz sumu i naleti na dva vuka homoseksualca dok su upraznjavali sex. Kaze ovaj prvi (dominantni): Jbt eno zeke, video nas je, znas kakav je sada ce cela suma znati za nas, hajde da ga uhvatimo! Pojurise oni tako zeku kroz sumu,a zek bes i tako bezeci naidje na jedan potok, nemajuci gde da se sakrije skoci u njega, zaroni i sakri se! Vuk (ovaj dominantniji) videvsi gde se zeka sakrio, zavrne nogavice, zagazi u potok, zavrne rukave i poce da napipava ne bi li nasao zeku! Kad jednom napipa nesto mekano! Misleci da je zeka izvuce iz vode, kad ono nije zeka vec zaba! Tek ce zaba: -Pusti me bre pedercino! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pecass Posted January 16, 2012 Report Share Posted January 16, 2012 Udvara se Hercegovac Hercegovki. ON: Oklen si ti, mala ? ONA: Å tate brige. ON: De bona rec' prvo slovo. ONA: I ON: De drugo slovo. ONA: Å ON: Ne znam ONA: IÅ ÄŒAPLJINE, BUDALO ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anthony Posted January 17, 2012 Report Share Posted January 17, 2012 I šta kažete doktore?!!!Riba...žaba? RAK, baba, RAK! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
durd Posted January 17, 2012 Report Share Posted January 17, 2012 Pitaju cigu deca: -Tata, tata hoćemo li ove godine na more! -Pa... mozda oćemo, a mozda 100% nećemo! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chowek Posted January 18, 2012 Report Share Posted January 18, 2012 Pitaju cigu deca: -Tata, tata hoćemo li ove godine na more! -Pa... mozda oćemo, a mozda 100% nećemo! Ja ga znam u verziji: "...80% 'oćemo, 100% nećemo." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonichammer Posted January 18, 2012 Report Share Posted January 18, 2012 ... i ja ga znam u toj verziji. 100%! Odlican! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.